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Ephesians 6:4

King James Version (KJV)

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Translations

Ephesians 6:4 - Amplified Bible

Fathers, do not irritate {and} provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training {and} discipline and the counsel {and} admonition of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - American Standard Version

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but nurture them in the chastening and admonition of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - Bible in Basic English

And, you fathers, do not make your children angry: but give them training in the teaching and fear of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - Darby Bible

And [ye] fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in [the] discipline and admonition of [the] Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - English Standard Version

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - King James Version

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - La Biblia de las Americas

Y vosotros, padres, no provoquéis a ira a vuestros hijos, sino criadlos en la disciplina e instrucciòn del Señor.

Ephesians 6:4 - The Message

Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.

Ephesians 6:4 - New American Standard Bible

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - Nueva Biblia Latinoamericana de Hoy

Y ustedes, padres, no provoquen a ira a sus hijos, sino crìenlos en la disciplina e instrucciòn del Señor.

Ephesians 6:4 - World English Bible

You fathers, don`t provoke your children to wrath, but nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - Young's Living Translation

And the fathers! provoke not your children, but nourish them in the instruction and admonition of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4 - Additional Comments

Though God has given parents the authority and power over children, it is not to be abused. We are to be patient with them, to not use undo punishment on them, and to give them reasonable rules, otherwise we will distance them from ourselves.
But what if you have brought them to wrath (either outer or inner), and enough times that their spirit is closed to you? How can you reopen their spirit to you?
First, test to see how open your child's spirit is. Rate yourself, from 1-5 on each question, where 1 is never, and 5 is always.
- Does he/she enjoy being with me?
- Do we spend time together regularly?
- Does he/she show respect to me and what I value?
- Do I show respect to him/her and what he/she values in life?
- How do you talk about your child to others?
- Does he/she enjoy talking with me?
- Do I listen to him/her?
- Does my child look at me during conversations?
So, how do you reopen your child's spirit?
- Become tenderhearted
Gentleness has a way of melting anger. Our body language must become soft, gentle, and caring. By doing this we are saying:
He/she is valuable and important.
I do not want his/her spirit closed; I care for him/her.
I know something is wrong. I acknowledge an offense has taken place and will slow down to correct it.
I am willing to listen. It is safe to share why he/she is angry or hurt.
- Increase understanding
Increase understanding of the pain he/she feels, and how he/she has interpreted my offensive behavior. Perception is reality.
It is important that he/she sees me really understanding how he/she feels. It may take a "cooling off" period before he/she can open up.
Allow him/her to voice her pain. It may help to have him/her write a letter to you describing the pain.
- Recognize the offense
Admit you were wrong. It may be that what we did was not wrong, but how we did it - our attitude was wrong. Don't brush off his/her hurt feelings because you feel he/she is too sensitive. Find out how and where you have hurt him/her.
- Attempt to hug
He/she has a need for your affection.
This will show if his/her spirit is opening or still closed. Hug, even if you have not shown much affection before.
- Seek forgiveness
Determine how deep the hurt is. He/she may have to see a real change in you before he/she can forgive. Don't drop the issue.
Determine how you will improve in this area.
If needed, start over again with #1, and go through the steps again. Pay attention to non-verbal signals.
If needed, back off for a while and try again later.

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